My oldest amazes me. For a child whose diagnosis means he is not meant to understand empathy, he one of the most loving, perceptive boys I have ever come across. We had an emergency today. Dad and younger son had to dash down the coast with said son’s dog bleeding from her mouth. Said dog is also a canine twin to her owner, so wouldn’t stop still long enough to ascertain injury. So off they toddled to the after-hours vet.
Older son and myself stayed behind, and went to help Nanna with a few non-urgent, but critical to a nearly 90 year old, duties. Always when he sees his Nanna he kisses her, tells her how much she is loved, and also how beautiful she is. Not a generic comment, but always detailed.
Tonight it was: “Nanna, I love you so much. You always make me smile when I see your happy brown eyes.” The one she loved the most was when he told her a few months back: “Nanna, you always make me feel safe and happy. You love me just because I am me.” That one nearly reduced her to tears. He makes her feel special and needed — something every older woman wants, and so important to a once vital, active person who loathes feeling like a burden. Her Grandson provides her with a renewed purpose in life merely by being the caring child he is. He makes me so proud.
Oh, and the manic dog had merely bitten her tongue. Lots of blood but little damage!
About the Author: Madmother is the mother of two boys, one of whom has Asperger’s Syndrome. This piece first appeared on her blog, Meaninless Meandering of a Madmother, and is reprinted here by permission.